When Zee traded my port: WEB and MWIDE

Zee and I do a lot of funny deals lately just because. He seems to like to negotiate his way out into what he wants and I do too, so to make every one happy, we make some deals. We’re over the Chocolate Era, although it goes without saying that I must still provide for my end of the bargain, and we are now entering a weirder transaction.

Every hour I write, he watches a korean drama I choose. Right now, he’s at episode 6 of The Descendants of the Sun.

Ask him if “kinilig” sya between Sergeant Major Dae Young and Lieutenant Myeong-Ju. He will begrudgingly say, “yes”.

DOTS

 


 

It all started with a panic. I messaged him saying I have a position in a third-liner and I have no means of accessing the internet in the next 3 crucial days. Even before, I already have the irrational fear of suddenly dying from an accident and being “all in” on a stock like CAL. How in the world can my family benefit from that?

I specifically told him that with my luck and my cursed port, I was almost certain that something awful would happen the next few days. He asked me not to be silly. “Ports are ports, they don’t know who you are, besides you’re not the kind who would apply feng shui on your stock account. I’ve known you to, how do you say it? ‘Create’ fate.”

magritte-665935

Never mind that, I just told him I needed his help. “I’m going to be gone a few days, it’s out of my hands. Can you please cut my position if necessary?” There was no stop loss order yet in PSE but fortunately, Zee was willing to help.

After the awkward moment of telling him what my password was, he preceded to ask, “Are you not afraid of a stranger holding your money like this?”

Well, Zee and I are already at the point where we regularly hurl insults and try to make the other person as uncomfortable as possible. It’s a tight competition of carino brutal. Daily trolling activities hence the Descendants Of The Sun deal and him sending me weird videos early in the morning. (“Could you please give me 10 seconds to re-orient myself before I watch this very disturbing clip of pimple popping. I’m not even sure what year it is.”)

So I immediately replied, “Oh please. That money is a small cut to you.”

But the truth is, I’ve got used to him. He was the kind of guy who would suffer for the matters of principle. It didn’t matter how hard it is or how unpopular his opinion was for the sake of honor and dignity. Once he decides, he will bullheadedly sit on his decision and never move.


gif choose your path.gif

Stay honorable or get indigestion

“Listen, listen. I have a plan.”, I told him excitedly. “I’ll loan from the bank AND then go home.”

“What? What in the world are you talking about?” He shot back. He didn’t sound so happy.

“It’s just business as usual.” I retorted. “Their insurance will take care of it. Besides, I’m not willing to trade my time, which amounts to about a year of NOT letting my hair down and enjoying a bit for myself, for the same amount of money I can so simply take! I call it street smart, isn’t it so? Fortune favors the brave. I’m just going to be very brave.”

He was choosing his words carefully. “Don’t do it, that’s not right. Is there no one who could lend you the same amount of money? What are you even going to do with it?”

“You know what I’m going to do with it. Besides, what’s so wrong with it? The bank will get their money thru insurance. They’re insured! I know so many who did it and they’re fine. The point is, I’m not going to pay all of it back so I don’t see myself finding a rich auntie to get that money from– because I got to pay her back for that.”

“That’s cheating…” He complained. “You’re just making me hungry. Wew.”

And that was it. That’s him when he’s mad. He gets hungry. I laughed and told him he was so nice even when he’s angry, I’ve seen so many men angry, at work, and in my life, and it was so comforting that he didn’t explode on me when all my defenses are down for him or that I wasn’t in line of fire when he wanted to pull triggers.

“I’m not going to allow you to do that.” He said decidedly. “My perception of you will change if you do, do you understand? Stay honorable. You won’t have to do that. Teka, kain lang ako.”


 

He ended up having to cut the stock. After reading his messages throughout the day when I was finally able to have internet access, he said something about getting another one.

Like the usual, I thought he only meant for me to review it. There must be something interesting in it. So I logged on COL to chart and then, there it was.

Surprise.

I have to confess it was funny, leaning on adorable because I know exactly what happened.

You give a man who seems to be born to trade an empty port with lots of potential and he will inevitably trade it. It’s an itch. I don’t know. We don’t question this. It’s how the universe works– We all gravitate towards doing what we do best.

 

When I asked him about it, he innocently said, “Oh yeah, I did, I guess. I have some and I thought you might like to. Hehe. Besides, let’s see if you’re right. Is your port really the chasm of trading bad luck or do you just need to do better?”

How it was another competition between us I don’t know, and then he added something else. “I got you into position plays okay? Just don’t take a look at your port until the end of the week.”

Sure.

b98e057c3d8bc8f7ded537ffa94d84d2


 

A Test of Principles

He’s tutoring new bastards now and he gets paid with milkshakes. He sent me a photo of the two lucky kids being taught in a cafe.

In the middle of our conversation he suddenly told me, as lightly as he could and trying not to make it a big deal out of it, “Celeste, I’ve made risky trades on your account. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll pay your money back.”

I immediately protested. “I’m not letting you do that.”

“I will.”, He said nonchalantly.
“No, I’m meeting you in the middle for what you’re doing.”
“Just this time.”

Dear friends,

Zee is stubborn, so knowing this, I know the conversation will not end according to how I want it.

“Let me think about it.” That was the best I could do to stop him.

Aside from the fact that the bank account linked to my COL was deactivated.

The most important matters are those he always try to say nonchalantly, simply because he’s… shy.

The beauty of social media is how I could understand the current temperature of the markets. The trading community is very vocal about what could be going on. It didn’t take a lot to find out what was going on.

 

 

He got 55% of my port in WEB.

“Was it WEB? That made you decide to say that?”
“Yes.”

The comments were awful. There was a very sharp sell off ever since the president of the company ran into some troubles with the president of the country. There was an issue about the license expiring, and on that day, the application for renewal of the license was harshly revoked by the government.

Absolutely every one predicted blood. Those who did not have any continued to laugh at other people’s pain and incinerated the fire of panic. 4.25 at current levels, they were betting it to hit the floor.

I tried to tell him it was okay, that I understand, and that I do not blame him nor does it change anything between us. I knew how devastating I’d feel once it does go to the floor but I wasn’t willing to disturb the harmony Zee and I have over money, no matter how desperately I needed it.

Money doesn’t matter so much in the end.

 

dont worry i understand.png

 

So I tried to make sure he’ll go easy on himself.

The next day, I was met with news.

 

web suspension.png

Great. Of all the things in my life, this is one of the things I hate the most. I hate waiting for things to turn out in the end. It’s agony, extended agony, playing on my biggest flaw which is overthinking. I always think of the worst case scenario, and even if none of those turned out as bad as I thought, I still couldn’t keep myself from repeating it.

Since WEB was suspended anyway, in the evening, I charted MWIDE. There was nothing we could do about WEB and if the market sentiment was going to crash and burn it, no amount of TA would matter just the mental preparation to lose our money at the floor price.


 

Some really random thing I made up. I remember vividly how Zee said that I need to learn how to take my gains. I’m so horrible at it that none of my good trades even mattered in the end because I never took profit.

So let’s start staging them…

stay safe

Level 1: Stay Safe
Protect your capital. Nothing is more important than preserving your ‘life’. I learned that now, it’s a hard lesson but my experience should be enough to drill it into my skull. Don’t even think about having a deep pain threshold when you’re not:

a. Trading money you can afford to lose/get scammed. Also otherwise known as the money that isn’t supposed to pay for your food, rent, education, and/or emergency fund. If you wanted to travel to somewhere just for the “likes”, pull yourself together and put it here unless this is trip couldn’t wait any longer.

b. When your original portfolio size has already been significantly reduced.

I think this is pretty self-explanatory unless you’re not emotionally attached to all the money you’ve lost that you could have spent on other things. It’s an opportunity trade-off, the money you lost could have been used somewhere else. I’m a constant offender of this. I keep thinking about what I sacrificed and refused for the sake of increasing my portfolio, and when I end up losing that money the sick feeling in my stomach becomes overwhelming. I wish I had used that money to get some sushi atleast. I miss sushi and this is torture. Or new shoes for work, my shoes are starting to detoriorate and peel off with wear. I wouldn’t even allow myself that.

There is a fine line between grim motivation to get it back versus hoping against hope and starting to wave your white flag. At one point in my life, I have tried to practice parkour. If you’re unfamiliar, it’s a sport that action movies are so keen into. 90% of the time, the tricks involving the superhuman abilities of flying through dangerous stunts can only happen if I believed I can do it. The moment I start running and gain momentum, air filling my lungs, my steps thundering against the ground, a split second of doubt was enough to kill my chances of succeeding. I would embarrassingly stop at the edge, and run back to where I started. I have learned that the same thing goes for surfing.

Trading is no different. Doubt and you will fail.

“Success is the ability to move from one failure to another without loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill, certified badass

 

tax them.jpg

Level 2: Talent Fee
Tax them for your effort.

I don’t like sitting around too much. It makes my bottom hurt, and I confess prolonged hours in front of the computer depresses me. I don’t know why, this is why I can’t enjoy an office job if I was ever given one. It makes me feel like my life didn’t move that day even if I’m sure it did.

Going through the charts and studying them one by one, comparing them, ranking them, double-checking them, planning them. It all takes effort and it will definitely make you sit down for hours. It’s necessary.

This shouldn’t go un-paid! Or atleast, I refuse to do so! Thinking like an entrepreneur will make you evaluate how much money you’re worth every hour. So tax the market, tax them for your effort, demand for your talent fee.

A 5% gain isn’t so bad. It’s commendable. Compare that to a 5% loss and you should know how a small number can decide to be your heaven or your hell. Like Kapitan Kidlat said, making 20 5% trades is also 100%.

I remember a quote saying 1+1 is 2, so is 0+2, and so is 3-1. The list goes on. What I’m saying is, how we do things can be different from others. Small, sure gains are as important as big single ones. In fact, there’s an added advantage of polishing your skills. With long term TF trades, I sit and observe. With this game plan however, I will repeatedly chart, enter, cut or take profit again and again until it becomes child play.

 

cool kid

 

Level 3: The Cool Kid
Don’t be the last one to leave the party or be caught dancing after the music stops.

The Cool Kid approach is trailing stops, you decide here. Above the 5% talent fee, but never way beyond after everyone left the disco. Having tight trail stops mean you’ll never get caught by the police once the neighbors start complaining from the noise, even if the police left anyway and the party still continued that night.

Remember, it doesn’t matter how much another person gained the same trade. There will ALWAYS be another winning trade. I haven’t been in this market a long time but I have seen atleast 10 “once in a lifetime” opportunities, being heavily advertised by the old devils running the place. Don’t fall for it. Trading is already a risky craft on its own, your discipline will be the ONLY thing you can count on to be safe.

One more thing: Don’t trust the poetic uncles trying to be cool promising you the moon and getting away with it through sheer humor and good camaraderie. ๐Ÿ™‚

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Level 4: Sixth Sense

Those who bought at the bottom and sold at the top.

You can not have the sixth sense without the scars.

The nature of this is unexplainable. Did they know an insider secret? Maybe, but like I’ve written before, insiders cheat each other too. So how can they be so brave? So sure? So courageous?

It could be luck, it could be anything. It could be skills. Definitely a combination of both would make it work.
I’m hoping on good news though because I’d like to think that we can develop this. It’s almost like muscle memory, by the time you’ve seen enough charts, dedicated your time in it, been in the market for a while, you’ll know.

Luckily enough, I’ve seen Zee make enough mistakes to make me wonder. At first, I was surprised by the sheer amount of it, but I was more taken aback when I see him bounce like he never got hit at all. It makes me reflect how mistakes are a part of life. So boringly usual like the inevitable hot quiet afternoons of summer. This is how it is, we mustn’t take it too personally. This is just how the clock ticks. You sweat in summer, you freeze in winter, you lose some trades, your milk will expire, the queue beside you will move faster. Sounds terribly cliche but it’s true. I wish we, me specifically, could view mistakes as boring and as usual and as uneventful part of life. Instead, I see them as heartwrenching, time-stopping, earth-shattering periods of my life. Maybe it’s too much ego, but it definitely is too much worry.

I wish I could come to that point where mistakes excite me because it meant room for improvement.

One of the best TED talks I have watched talked about what Warren Buffet would invest in, and I specifically remember the third because I knew I had to work on that.

“Energy”

Energy, he said, is when you’re running on full speed, with your heart beating against your chest, and your clothes clinging against your body and then suddenly, you see a post fast approaching your line of direction. How quick do you move? How fast do you react? How fast do you pick yourself up? How quick do you adjust?

1

Successful people, he said, aren’t those who didn’t make mistakes. Some people he knew would just wilt at the first sign of rejection. However, those who really made it, picked themselves up fast and then….

 

2.png

have a go again.


 

MWIDE was an obvious choice for showing strength near the all time high.

Here are some of the charts I’ve sent Zee. Really simple but hey I’ve been asleep for a while now, and what’s the point in complicating?

I guess it would be for you to see how I make mine. I have no idea if it would help anyone, but here it is.

ath

 

 

think think

high probability set ups


 

The next day after WEB got suspended, they lifted the trading halt and resumed.

web trade starts

I wasn’t expecting much except for a bloody bullet against me. I’ve shut off social media so I woulnd’t know how terrible it was.

And that’s when Zee messaged again.

it didnt go to the floor

 

I wonder…

what’s going on? So I logged on.

day change

 

first reaction

Did you even see that coming?


 

Zee made 700,000 php that day so he’s celebrating with…

celebrate tayo

milk tea.

When the dust settled and I know we were all able to dodge a bullet, I’ve only really realized that he was willing to take that bullet for me.


The House Stands Strong

I told him I couldn’t get up one morning because my body is literally in so much pain. I felt like a cattle being escorted to my own death. I was clocking in almost 80 hours of work that week. I cried while fixing and then I half-scolded myself for the possibility of getting there late. For anyone who has never been under this kind of tremendous stress, you are blessed and I will never hope it to happen to anyone.

I was given heavy tasks reserved for senior positions even when they held off my promotion for a bad managerial call they made and they had made me answer for. Even any requests for transfer was barred.

Every after work, I come home almost totally useless. I couldn’t move aymore, I was too tired mentally and physically.

None of my trades have worked. I couldn’t watch them properly. My plan B was failing. I felt trapped in a life that was killing every self-respect I had or any hopes for a better future. I was turning into someone I wasn’t proud of.

I was becoming callous, angry, and unkind. Everything I didn’t want to become. I suffered for days on end, but I couldn’t quit and in my darkness, I felt shame. I was being beaten down to submission, I couldn’t fight back because I needed the money. I was starting to lose respect for myself. I started withdrawing from everyone.

you called for help

Alpha Centauri messaged, “Where are you? Do you need help?”

And then, a few more people did. Galahad. Arthur. Yumi. Bastards. “Are you okay?”

“How can I help?”

d74a98219b13472a13da853b34793dd1.jpg

And ofcourse Zee.

He never left. He was always there. He would talk to himself if necessary, if I didn’t have anything left inside of me to say anything to him.

“I’m tired,” I told him.

“I know.” He says gently. “I wish I could do something about it.”

bad time determination.jpg

“I can’t anymore”

“Yes, you can.”

“I still believe in you.”

it's still you

The House stays strong.



you are filled with determination

Forevers Yours,

Celeste

“I’ll Fight”

I wanna see you run
Anywhere you want
Never let the darkness hold you back
No fear of getting lost

I wanna see you fly
Way beyond the sun
Anything you’re ever gonna dream
I pray that it will come

But if you ever fall down straight to the bottom
And you can’t get back where you started
Any place any time
You gotta know for you I’ll fight
(Ooh ooh, ooh ooh)

Where you wanna go
I’d love to take you there
Wish that I could make the road easy
I wish that life was fair
Don’t wanna see you cry
Even when it rains
And I hope you don’t forget this
You were born for better things

But if you ever fall down straight to the bottom
And you can’t get back where you started
With no strength to stand
I’m gonna reach for your hand
When the going gets rough right when it’s hurting
I will be there to help bear the burden
Any place any time
You gotta know for you I’ll fight
(Ooh ooh, ooh ooh)
Any place any time
You gotta know for you I’ll fight

Anywhere you go
You’re gonna find me
No matter what you need
If you ever fall down and you can’t get back
If you lose your strength to stand

If you ever fall down straight to the bottom
And you can’t get back where you started
With no strength to stand
I’m gonna reach for your hand
When the going gets rough right when it’s hurting
I will be there to help bear the burden
Any place any time
You gotta know for you I’ll fight
(Ooh ooh, ooh ooh)
Any place any time
You gotta know for you I’ll fight

Extra stuff:

bakit namanprankster quite arrogant

๐Ÿ˜€

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4 thoughts on “When Zee traded my port: WEB and MWIDE

Add yours

  1. Get well! Kaya mo yan! ๐Ÿ˜€ You’re lucky and blessed that you are connected with people that will lead you to the right path and help you achieve your goals in life. ๐Ÿ˜€

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  2. it was a good read celeste! im actually at the same situation right now, and yeah determination! determination! determination! to stand up and pick myself up to reach the heavens again, lucky that you have met zee which i can only dream of it! but thanks to his blog i slowly study and research on techniques and plans for setups which ill benefit with, kudos to you celeste, hope to read more from you,

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