Dating Mr. Stocks

The problem with stocks is that they’re similar to men.

And the problem with men, is that, they’re generally very simple, but we love to make them complicated.

It’s true– The whole business of Taylor Swift is built on that concept.

Like for example, the nerd guy with excellent grades get ignored by large because of how ‘boring’ and ‘steady’ he moves. “Oh he doesn’t make me breathless!” Then, the same girls who said that flock to the guy though, the moment he establishes his financial report. Funny thing. Let’s call him Mr. BlueChips

Well, I’m not really keen on discussing Mr. BlueChips right now.

I’d like to talk about the time I had to listen to Mariah Carey soundtracks, motivate myself with a ton of You Can Do It Girl, and eat a tub of ice cream in between pathetic bouts of crying.

You see, in the stock market, there’s a particular type of stock that ZF readers are very well into. The type that makes what Mr. BlueChip makes in a year in just a shorter amount of time. Sometimes, even for just a few days of ceiling play.

They’re the third liners or the basura. Penny stocks. I can’t even find a good name for them. But how are they related to men, you ask?

Oh, yes. He’s always there. Bad boy, leather jacket, drives his motor cycle fast. Like John Travolta in Grease which I’m sure was the epitome of ‘things’ back then when spandex and leggings was all the rage. Winks at you. Lures you in without luring you in. Do you get it? Do you get it GET it?

You see most of the people were sent to the stock markets for a promise of ‘riches’ and they, like me, were never really taught about these bad boys. Work and Invest! I get it. They’re right to be frank with you… If you want to be free quite late in the grind. So every one got in the market as FUNDAMENTALISTS.

The problem starts when you first hear about these bad boys and the party they like to throw around. “I had such a great time last night at Penn’s!”

What. Intrigue. Is. That.

Is this where the wolf of wall street is made and are they as good looking as Leonardo DiCarpio? Is this where guts meet glory?

So poor fundamentalists– or long-term dating type of girls– get so attracted to these 50%-in-a-day Rock Star.


Dear darling,

oh you poor thing. So you played as Ms. Fundamental AKA Long-term to a Mr. Technical play AKA short and sweet? What song were you relating to when it was all happening? I can tell you what mine was. (hint: it’s *ahem* Taylor Swift. told ya so).

Guy took me for a ride! Oh what excitement. And then, he faltered. I was left dancing the salsa alone. And my, isn’t that awkward? My dance moves would have worked for Mr. BlueChips though. But that’s not what I need, otherwise, what’s the use of even playing.

Let me tell you one thing, girl. Life is simple. This is simple. As long as you play by the rules and don’t try changing it. You’re special, but not that special. I’m sorry. I found out the hard way as well.

Mr. Penn will never change but his rewards and perils will remain constant as well. And if you still want that reward, change your system.

It’s quite rewarding, I have to tell you that. wink emoticon

So learn to do the tango, if that is his game. And learn to leave before the party is over. Rinse, repeat. Ride his motorcyle high but never ever fall inlove with his kind. Leave when it’s time to leave, and cut your losses.

Love, Celeste

3 thoughts on “Dating Mr. Stocks

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  1. this got me!!! 💘 I love your writings youre so good at it I envy you. as well as stocks. I spent weeks on studying, afraid to even touch it.. yet..

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